Love in the Time of Materialism
I have noticed a trend wherein most discussion of dualism veers into Gnosticism — the soul trumping the body. This article is about the reverse problem of dualism where the body trumps the soul.
In this tabloid story, a man considers himself “married” to a doll, and keeps another doll as a “mistress”. This is a result of his consideration that women are, “an enormous investment of time, money, and emotion, and I’m not interested in having someone in my life who may bail at any time, or who transforms into someone unpleasant.” In these words we can hear a man too afraid to risk anything for actual love, and so make-believes love with a bit of silicone.
The whole story is quite disturbing because it considers the best woman as one who is without any desires of her own. The website to order these dolls even boasting, “never complains” and “always available”. “Marrying” dolls dehumanizes actual women by creating this evil ideal where women are simply the playthings of men.
This contrasts greatly with Catholic teaching on authentic love, which is necessary for joy in life. A man in love goes so far as to lay down his life for those he loves. Manly love is about sacrifice to help others and not about using people as things to meet ones own desires. This is not love:
He stubbornly clings to his own desires and doesn’t sacrifice himself for his wife. It is not manly love to demand others lay down their hopes for you. Manly love reaches out beyond oneself to the other. In doing this laying down of selfish pride to meet the needs of those we care about we paradoxically can find contentment and peace. This sacrifice of self is why this man learned that his child with down syndrome was “the light in the darkness”, and why he ended up happy his wife had the child despite his pressuring her to abort the child’s life. The sacrifice of true love brings us to joy.